I have set a date for t, 20th Nov. Of course he has looked better and better since I set it. That said he is really uncomfortable picking out his feet, in part due to infections and also because his back legs, particularly his left does not want to bend. Still, I half expect myself to u turn at the last moment.
And if that wasn't hard enough I lost my lovely cat Woody to cancer. I am terribly sad about it, particularly because I hoped he would help with t (I even made him promise). Woody always gave the best hugs when I cried about T. I have been so upset I have taken to writing poetry. I don't really like poetry - nor am I very good at it, but much like writing this blog I have found it quite cathartic.
Anyway, here is my poem for Woody, it really doesn't do him justice
The worst of the firsts
First time coming home without him here to greet me,
First evening on the sofa without him on my lap,
First trip up the stairs without him by my side,
First night in my bed with empty arms, not sleeping,
But wake to find no warmth snuggled to my back and dawn breaks silently, no announcement from the cat,
First shower without him waiting on the landing,
First trip down the stairs without him at my heals,
First kettle boiled without watchful eyes upon me,
First time I leave the house with no need to say 'goodbye',
Goodbye is endless, love enduring, mourning for the cat
Having said I was hoping Woody would help with T, even though he is not here in a funny way Woody has. I adored Woody, life without him was unthinkable, putting him down was unthinkable, but when it came to it I found I could, I was with him at the end and kept calm and was able to make the call before he truly suffered. It's been a bit over a week, and whilst I miss him terribly, I know I am going to be OK, and I know I made the right decidion. Perhaps it will be the same with T.
And if that wasn't hard enough I lost my lovely cat Woody to cancer. I am terribly sad about it, particularly because I hoped he would help with t (I even made him promise). Woody always gave the best hugs when I cried about T. I have been so upset I have taken to writing poetry. I don't really like poetry - nor am I very good at it, but much like writing this blog I have found it quite cathartic.
Anyway, here is my poem for Woody, it really doesn't do him justice
First time coming home without him here to greet me,
First evening on the sofa without him on my lap,
First trip up the stairs without him by my side,
First night in my bed with empty arms, not sleeping,
But wake to find no warmth snuggled to my back and dawn breaks silently, no announcement from the cat,
First shower without him waiting on the landing,
First trip down the stairs without him at my heals,
First kettle boiled without watchful eyes upon me,
First time I leave the house with no need to say 'goodbye',
Goodbye is endless, love enduring, mourning for the cat
Having said I was hoping Woody would help with T, even though he is not here in a funny way Woody has. I adored Woody, life without him was unthinkable, putting him down was unthinkable, but when it came to it I found I could, I was with him at the end and kept calm and was able to make the call before he truly suffered. It's been a bit over a week, and whilst I miss him terribly, I know I am going to be OK, and I know I made the right decidion. Perhaps it will be the same with T.
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